Do you see yourself here?

I am mad at myself right now. I go to the store on Mondays and for some reason we have gotten in the habit of having a treat on grocery day. I got way too many sweets yesterday and the hubby and I both felt awful last night. This morning he had an early dentist appointment to help prepare for Friday's big dental surgery appointment.While he was gone I baked two small sweet potatoes that had started to gaze at me from the counter top. I didn't eat anything until he got home. He takes the rest of the donuts in to the living room to have with his coffee. I initially said I didn't want any, but went on and had one (Krispy Kreme Glazed Pumpkin Cake) with my coffee. Hmmm. Tummy felt ok. Went back into the kitchen to read, where I can put my book on the bistro height table and be oh, so comfy. I stay and read in the warm kitchen and couldn't get those sweet potatoes out of my head. Had to get up and fix a sweet potato, adding butter and salt , and it was so yummy that I got up and fixed the other one. Hmmm, still feeling ok. Not quite sick yet. Oh, what is that? Can it be my remaining candy bar from yesterday? Yep, more coffee and now I have consumed the candy bar. You realize that I am, in essence, hiding in my kitchen eating? This is something I haven't done for quite some time. I am mad at myself for doing this, and I carefully hide all the wrappers in the trash and make my way back into the living room and hubby stops me and says "what is that on your face?". Busted. Chocolate on my face. Now I'm embarrassed and mad at him for calling me out on it. This leads to me flinging a tiny, unwarranted fit about something completely different and now I'm saying I'm mad at him, when I actually am mad at myself and don't want him to know it. Anything like this ever happen to you?

Not the best day for the happiest girl in the world. It's got to get better from here.

Later, TTFN.

Why am I dreaming this?

On Tuesday night I dreamed that my husband and I were on some type of vacation. There was this really good looking gal that was assisting us is some way, perhaps as a tour guide. She kept giving my husband the "eye". Even in my dream, my husband was unaware of this flirting. (He never knows that chicks are checking him out. He is quite a hunk and all women love him. He is super friendly and just thinks ladies are being nice to him.) Anyway in this dream, we are all three set to go somewhere and I can't find the things that I need to join them. He is patiently waiting for me to find whatever it is I am hunting, but she keeps inching closer and closer to him as he waits. I can't remember everything about the dream, but it did include me not locking the door to where we were staying. It was very open to the outside, like a sun porch or screened structure and I remember seeing wild animals of sorts, maybe a gorilla roaming freely outside. I remember knowing I needed to lock things up and I found pad locks, but instead of extra keys, there were bolt cutters to cut the locks when you lost your keys. This dream when on for seemingly hours and contained all the usual dream elements, but the main theme was this chick wanting to be with my hubby.

If I want to be honestly analytical, this dream probably occurred because of our recent trip to California. We rode in several open vehicles, we saw lots of wild animals at the zoo and before the trip, the hubs had to cut our old locks off of our luggage with wire cutters.

Therefore, I know that this dreams really mean nothing sinister since it contains all the elements of things that have actually happened to us recently. Right? I even discussed the dream with hubby and was laughingly reassured that he loves me and will never leave me and it was just a dream.

Well, then last night-the next night, by the way-I dreamed about this girl again and this time I realized who she is. Angelina Jolee! Yes, Angelina Jolee is trying to steal my husband! Guess what? In this dream, he went with her and he told me he was going to go with her. This dream involved all my usual dream themes. We were in a large room where folks were eating cafeteria style. Perhaps a hospital setting? I remember lots of former friends being there and asking me what was wrong? Was I sad? I remember piling all these food items in industrial plastic type packaging on my tray and trying to get to a table with them. Then instead of eating, I was trying to find a seat so I could draw a sketch of someone in the cafeteria. I don't think it was Angelina, but I'm not sure. Again, the dream seems to go on forever with lots of other stuff happening.

When I told hubs about this dream, he laughed and reminded me that when he was out of town last week, when I called him, he told me he watched one of Angelina's movies in the hotel room.

So here is what I'm thinking. Perhaps I am feeling like I need to do more for my hubby. He is very concerned with current events and keeps up with the news, some might think he is almost obsessive about staying informed. I try to stay aware of what is going on and feel like I am helping to keep him grounded, while supporting him in these areas, as well as others. Do I feel like I am losing him to his computer, television and radio? No, it can't be that, he has always been very intense and passionate about his interests, so I'm used to that.

Am I unconsciously concerned about my body image, and only acting like I really don't mind being 30 pounds overweight? What do you think? Are dreams sometimes just dreams? Or do they always have to mean something? Let me know what you think before Angelina takes my husband!

Old habits die hard

I suppose this is quite true. It's funny how a change of scenery motivated me temporarily to become more active. I walked like crazy and really pushed myself when I was on vacation. I get back home and fall right back into the habit of going from my chair in my computer room, to the couch, to the chair in my studio. It's no one's fault but my own, I know. I just want you to know that you aren't alone in your bad habits. It's like we are our own enablers.

Well, the new fitness center near my house will be opening in January and I am hoping it will have some programs that an overweight, sassy Baby Boomer like me can handle. I know I won't be comfortable in a room full of hotties that want to stay fit. I just want to stay motivated and build my endurance and my flexibility. I know that I'll never be able to put my heels around my head, like I did when I was a kid, but I know I can do better than I do now.

Today's plan is to stand outside and watch my hubby do yard maintenance. That usually means running back and forth and getting tools and such for him, so at least I'll get some fresh air and a bit of motion. Well, I'd better go start the coffee, he'll be back soon with his goodies from Home Depot.

Enjoy your day and stay healthy!

You call it corn, we call it maize

Remember that commercial? I have a new one available if anyone is asking.

You call it polenta, we call it grits.

Now I'm sure the purists out there will say, no it's not the same. The grind is different, and such, but no matter what you call it, this is a yummy treat made from ground corn. It's a good way to keep calories low and the tummy warm. I use instant grits by Quaker, not only for the convenience of just adding water, but they have a really cool interactive web page. You can buy flavored grits, I usually just get the butter or plain and add my own extras. I really like to add some grated (read powdered) Parmesan cheese.

So that's my low cal, low fat, high flavor tip for today...GRITS!

(By the way, that also stands for Girls Raised In The South) that's me, too.

Just my luck...

I told you that I was using my treadmill again and quite successfully, I might add. For some reason, the rollers had loosen up and the belt was too far over on the left and it was rubbing and making a crazy noise. As a temporary measure, I trimmed about 1/2" of the belt off and that seemed to do the trick. Yesterday when my hubby saw his utility knife on my table, he asked what I had used it for. Short version, he insists on getting his tools out and fixing the roller so it wont slide to one side. What happens next? He broke it and how it either has to have a part ordered or even be replaced. Grrrr.

Anywho, in the mean time, what is your favorite treadmill type piece of equipment? I just might go ahead and replace it, as it is about ten years old, even if it is a NordicTrac. Do any of you have those ones that are either elliptical or the glider type (think Tony Little)? I'd like to know what really works best for someone like me, specifically baby boomer, bad knees, overweight and not very athletic.

Let me know.

Getting back on track

Once a year, my DH and I get first class tickets to fly to California. This is a wonderful way to travel and I'll take five hours in the air over three days on the train, any time. The only problem is on flight snacks. We take off from Virginia and fly on a commuter jet to Atlanta. This flight usually takes about 90 minutes. The attendant brings the snack trolley only once during this time span, but you can depend on at least a soft drink, juice or coffee along with a snack of either chips, pretzels, peanuts or cookies. You can request more if you want to, there is usually plenty.

Then there is the layover in Atlanta, fortunately on the way out there was no extra time to stop for snacks in the airport and we high tailed it to the boarding area. This is the plane that actually has a first class compartment and first class it is. Bottle water waiting at your seat. As soon as you sit down, you are offered a beverage while the rest of the folks are boarding. After take off, when the plane has leveled off, you give your order for the meal. Since we flew early it was breakfast. I chose an omelette. It came with choice of bagel or croissant, with butter/cream cheese and jam. It also included quite a large bowl of fruit and another beverage or two.

As soon as these were consumed and all the dishes returned to the front, the attendant comes back with a hot towel. When she comes back to pick that up she is already taking orders for more beverages. This goes on and on until it is time to buckle up to land.

Upon landing, you usually meet your ride and make the required plans to....yes...go somewhere and eat. It was eat and sightsee and eat and visit and eat and watch TV. On the way home, reverse the trip and you get the same amount of food, usually with a two hour layover in the airport for even more snacks. You get the picture? Is it any wonder that the DH and I gained five pounds each in five days? Yikes.

Well, I got back on track today with fruits and veggies and water and even (drum roll please) twenty minutes on the treadmill. I feel very motivated and not inclined to beat myself up for the weight gain.

So I'm back home and ready to take care of my hubby, myself and my home. It's what I love to do. I am not ashamed at all to say I love being married and doing housework. I have plenty of time to do fun things for myself and I am blessed to no longer have to punch a time clock.

Regarding life and staying healthy and fit... remember that we are all in this together. For me, it's all about building each other up. We don't need any help tearing ourselves down, we're pretty good at that already. I don't blog here about political leanings, or religious beliefs. It's not because I don't have strong convictions. If you know me, you know these things already. I guess what I'm trying to say is this...I never say anything online that I wouldn't say to someone's face. For me blogging is the same as speaking in public and I was raised to be polite and I expect others to be. I hope that's not too much to ask. I made a comment on someone's blog last month, in response to a very rude thing that was said about someone I knew and it set that person's followers on fire. I was called out quite rudely by the blog author and I sent her an e-mail of apology, telling her I was unaware that she and I didn't see eye to eye on allowing rude comments and wished her well and we mutually agreed to withdraw as each other's followers. I then removed the comment (which she didn't have to post in the first place, knowing how inflamed her group would be).

Why am I telling you all this? I'm not sure, I just know that I don't feel bad for limiting myself to positive blogs. I do know that I will be more careful about commenting on blogs that I'm new to. I know there are bullies on blogs. They all seem to have excuses for their behavior. It's not even easy to feel sympathy for someone that is supposedly ill, when they spew hate through comments. Why don't I have sympathy for them? Because they were probably like that before they got sick. Mean people don't become sympathetic in my eyes just because they are sick. They are still mean. I'm a very discerning person and I can recognize evil and I stay away from it.

Well, what started out as a positive post about getting back on track, turned into a rant on mean people.

In any event, I hope you all had a fun weekend and are ready to face the world tomorrow. Raise your face to the sun and feel it's warmth. I know I will.

Would you still read?

Having several blogs sometimes means neglecting one. I will be on vacation next week and one of the things I will be reflecting on (in between sight seeing around Mission Bay, and just enjoying riding the trolley) is this blog. I am not ashamed to admit that I love comments and while I know that I have followers here at my weight loss blog, I don't get the same feedback that I get with my other blog.

My question is this...would any of you follow me over to A Walk In The Park if I stop posting here? I am thinking about making more posts there regarding healthy living, as well as the usual chatter that I engage in.

I wish I could take everyone on vacation with me and as I said, I will be relaxing and deciding if I need to reduce my computer time. I will be using my comments here as part of this decision. I have 28 followers here and would love to have you move over to my other blog, but if you prefer to stay here and read about healthy living, recipes and occasional weight loss, but with much more sporadic posts, please let me know.

Well, I have tons of stuff to do to get ready for my California vacation next week, so I'll be absent until I return.

I hope you all have a great week. Stay healthy and happy.